#44 - Mob War

This is the worst movie that has ever been made in the history of all cinema. Everything about this movie was poorly planned, created, executed, and performed. The writing was bad. The acting was bad. The directing was bad. The editing was bad. The cinematography was bad. The sound design was bad. The special effects were bad. They had lights.

There are signs that the movie you are about to watch is a flaming pile of crap. One of them could be that the only name actor in the movie is Jake LaMotta. THAT'S RIGHT!! Raging Bull Jake LaMotta. And let me tell you, this guy has the acting range from a quiet Marlon Brando ripoff to unneccessary yelling as an attempt at actual emotion, with nothing in between. This guy has no range. He has two levels, and they both suck.

There are signs that the movie you are in the middle of watching is a flaming pile of crap. One of them is when a rival mobster sends people down to a Central American drug to take over someone else's drug ring. Actually, that's not so bad, its the fact that the ensuing gunfight footage involves a bunch of guys in camo just randomly shooting guns and the gunfire sound effects DONT MATCH THE GUNS THAT ARE SHOOTING!!!!! Oh, and to top it off, there is dialogue that actually sounds like a couple of guys in a recording studio yelling out random gunfight phrases, and then playing that over the random gunfight scene. It might have been the worst combination audio and visual elements I have ever seen.

There are signs that movie you just sat through is a flaming pile of crap. One of them is that before the final mano y mano gunfight, they call attention to the fact that one of the guys has a limited number of bullets, and then he shoots his gun about a HALF A MILLION TIMES!!!! How stupid do you have to be to let that happen in a movie you are making? What compounds the idiocy of it is that after he has shot the damn thing a ton of times, HE ACTUALLY RELOADS THE GUN!!!! I'm sorry, I must have missed all those clips he had in his pockets to reload it throughout the scene. Also, the other guy in the gunfight shoots his gun about eleventy-billion times, with a six shooter type gun, which at ONE time, he also reloads. I'm sorry, I guess I missed all of the loose bullets loading up his pockets so that he could reload every six shots or so.

The only thing that this movie has going for it is that Escape From Death Row is on the other side of the DVD. It was such a waste of time for everyone involved. I don't know why they felt the need to put it on a DVD. I couldn't even find a poster for the damn thing so I ad to use the box cover for the DVD set. Crap on celluloid my friends, crap on celluloid.