#35 - Mickey

I'm not even going to set anything up. This movie sucked. Apparently John Grisham grew up playing baseball, so he decided to write a movie that contains baseball. Hey John, stick with the lawyers. Tell a Christmas tale every now and then if you must, but leave baseball alone. This movie is only partly about baseball anyways. You see Harry Connick is a bit of a shady accountant, or lawyer, or something like that. Maybe Grisham did have a laywer in this. I don't remember and it doesn't really matter. He did some questionable things, you might call it cooking the books, and the IRS came a calling. But you can't feel bad for him cause he did it right after his wife's death cause he needed the money. That makes cheating on your taxes okay.

Did you catch the part about baseball? No? Well his kid is a pitcher and was about to play in his little league championships, but good ol' dad had to run away cause the lawman was on his tail. What does he do? Goes to Vegas, lies about his kids age and gets him onto a little league team that does so well it goes to the little league world series, and its not until the kid takes off his fake glasses that people catch on to their whereabouts. So the IRS tracks Harry down and he goes to jail. Right? Well, not so fast. You see Cuba is playing in the series and this kid is their only chance of beating them which would be good for a certain U.S. senator. Are you freaking kidding me? International politics swinging on the outcome of a little league game with an ineligble player brought there by a father evading the IRS, but everything is okay because the father and son love each other. I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.

Am I suppossed to believe that not one person would catch on to this crap because Harry Connick is charming? Am I suppossed to believe that nobody would catch on because a kid has dyed hair and fake glasses on? Am I suppossed to believe that the IRS agent who has been hunting down Harry is going to sit next to him during the game, waiting to arrest him until after its over, and is going to be completely involved in the game, even though he really doesn't like baseball? Bunch of contrived crap told in a family safe environment. Hey, just cause it's a family movie doesn't neccessarily mean its crap, but this one doesn't help the argument.

As I was watching this movie I was thinking about how the kids look great playing baseball, but suck as actors. Turns out, thats what they did. They got real little leaguers to play the little leaguers. Its a good thought, but SOMEBODY has to be better that the main kid. He wasn't just bad. He was obviously not an actor, but got an actor job. I guess he tried his best, but it was no good. Next time, use actors because you can film around bad baseball skills, you can't do the same with bad acting skills. Oh my god. Did I just say "next time"? This time I really threw up.